Notes From the Back of the Medication Line

Notes from the back of the medication line, straight up, no juice chaser, by a mental health professional who has seen the madness, defined the madness and lived to tell the tales, sanity intact.

Name:
Location: back of the line

I am what I am.

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Who Moved My Brain?

Somewhere between the bed and the bowl...
eV lost what was left of her mind
. We have yet to determine if its a bug or whats bugging her. She is not suited for human contact-moody, mean, intolerant, bitter, hostile-as always. But on top of the usual, she's too sick to rant and rave. Don't worry she's saving up...

NOTABLE QUOTABLES

“It's better to be pissed off than pissed on.”
~unknown, but adopted by moody eV

NOTABLE QUOTABLES

"I think we should take Iraq and Iran and combine them into one country and call it Irate. All the pissed off people live in one place and get it over with."
~Denis Leary

Thursday, February 23, 2006

INTERNET BOO-TAY

FYI: Just Because You Can Doesn’t Mean You Should
While browsing thru the new blogs I was shocked to find a married couple that had pictures of their various body parts along with an offer for interested parties to share said parts sexually. (There is a reason why people are paid to take off their clothes and others are not.) To each his own.But let me just remind all of you thinking of doing likewise about the unwritten rules of courtesy when showing the whole world-wide web what YOU think you’re really working with… I call this:

KEEP IT TO YOURSELF IF…
~It appears to be jiggling, even in a still photo
~When showing your rump there is no frame or background left in the picture
~That same or similar rump is old, wrinkled, lumpy, saggy etc. (M/F)
~The body part you are sharing has more hair than the hair on your head
~It seems that one would actually have to lift one of your body parts in order to see another/or the one you’re ATTEMPTING to share
~You spread something and it looks bigger, older, and scarier than it did closed, PLEASE!
~The presented body part(s) appear stained due to poor hygiene ...Yuck!
~Said parts are shorter, longer, fatter or otherwise misshaped/or irregularly shaped
~What should be there isn’t or what shouldn’t be there is…
~Your parts have warts, acne, sores, old knife wounds or other marks/openings that you did not have at birth

Monday, February 20, 2006

San Quentin RIP Lounge Reopens

Live from Marin County, Mike Morales stars in "Needle of Death"
Appearing tonight only in The Big Jab Room is Michael Morales, taking over where "Tookie" Williams left off-on the central restraining table, to an invitation-only crowd. Claiming redemption and distancing himself from the previous act that got him to the "big time," Morales will give the performance of his life unless the former actor, Kennedy marry-up, and Cali Governor pulls the plug on his eight minutes of fame. Odds are there will be no curtain calls after this highly anticipated performance.

NOTABLE QUOTABLES

“If we are to abolish the death penalty, I should like to see the first step taken by my friends the murderers”
~Alphonse Karr

Sunday, February 19, 2006

NOTABLE QUOTABLES

“He that but looketh on a plate of ham and eggs to lust after it hath already committed breakfast with it in his heart”
~C.S. Lewis

A to da Z About Me

This is as open as it gets folks!
A-Age: Old enough to know better and do so most of the time!
B-Band listening to right now: XM Satellite
C-Career: Critic for Life
D-Drink or smoke: No/No. That’s why I blog-to cope
E- Easiest person/s to talk to: Myself/God, not necessarily in that order, often at the same time.
F-Favorite song/s at the moment: Gold Digger/We Belong Together/Diary
G-Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: Worms of the sour type
J-Junk foods you like: Anything in a taco shell, but fish
L-Longest car ride ever: Forever, from Cali to Kentucky on a walkabout
M-My favorite Sport/s: Anything viewed from a reclining position on the couch
N-Number of relationships you've had: What’s a relationship? Besides, I never kiss/tell
O-One wish you have: Heaven or a Jag convertible, whichever happens first.
P-Phobias: Nosy people, below water level cruise cabins and politicians.
Q-Favorite Quote: Anything I may say at any time
R-Reason to smile: Only when I am VERY happy.
S-Secrets: Yes
T-Time you wake up: Depends…10am or 10pm
U-Unknown fact about you: I’m really pretty serious about most things personal
V-Vegetable/fruit you hate: Brussels Sprouts/Liberace
W-Worst habit: Procrastination. But once I get going I’m very thorough/precise.
X-X-rays you have had: Most everything, perhaps referencing my age?
Y-Your Pet Peeves: People who are never on time and people who never read ANY news
Z-Zodiac Sign: The Cross

Thursday, February 16, 2006

All Tied Up And No Place To Go

Wed Feb 15, REUTERS
A German youth who tied himself to a foldaway bed because he was bored was rescued by police after becoming trapped in its mechanism, officials said on Tuesday. Neighbors alerted the police in the western German town of Schwelm after hearing the 16-year-old's cries for help late on Monday night. When police entered the apartment, they found the bed had folded itself away and the red-faced youth was tied upside down to it with a tow-rope and wire and unable to free himself. "He said he did it because he was bored," said Dietmar Trust, a spokesman for the local police. "He was visibly embarrassed but it was also a pretty amusing situation.
eV comments: Oh, but I must …So, was he dressed or undressed? What else does he do “to relax?” And, where is his ‘tie me up, tie me down’ partner that cruelly abandoned this young man? Reminds me of how all the soft and leather restraints used to disappear from the psych units…Guess that’s how mental health employees act when they’re bored?

White House Groundhog Rears His Ugly Head

Our White House basement rodent-Dick Cheney, finally reared his ugly bald head to whine on Faux News about the shooting accident. Calling it one of the worst days of his life, he took full responsibility for the incident. Funny, I recall two of the worst days of my life involving Cheney too.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Answer Me This...

Just how UNcruel and usual is the death penalty supposed to be? How can we add more creature comforts to legalized killing? There must be some way to make death sentences more user friendly...

THIS WEEK'S VILLAGE IDIOT

Co-Idiots, Sharon Stone and Phil Bronstein
Word is that Sharon and Phil have agreed to end their vicious child custody battle by agreeing to have their adopted son live one year with Phil in San Francisco, and the next with Sharon in Los Angeles Both will have ‘liberal visitations.’ This little solution will occur over a period of four years and then reviewed. Is it all about the parents even in Hollyweird? Guess so. Hey Phil and Sharon: This is a kid, not a puppy! Oh, and you two are supposed to be the adults…

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

NOTABLE QUOTABLES

V-Day Blah Humbugs
“I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.”

“I feel bad for people who die on Valentine's Day. How much would flowers cost then, ten grand?”
~Jay Leno

“I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV.”
~Tracy Smith

eV's TOP 5

Top 5 Reasons Why I've Officially Cancelled Valentine's Day for The Whole World, Including the WWW (the web and the wrestlers.) So It Is Written...So Shall It Be!
5. No Honey
4. No Money
3. No Honey with some Money
2. No Money to buy me some Honey
1. No Honey giving away any Money

Psychologically Speaking...

Today's Topic: Long Distance Internet Dating
Isn't it like one email away from dating a prisoner with a life sentence? Guess the advantage of the latter is that they don't show up on your doorstep looking like they've been on house arrest for years.

Say What!

Have Skull Will Travel:
Was it really necessary to arrest the Haitian woman for having a human skull with just a tad bit of meat on the bones in her carry-on bag? This, like other working professionals was simply part of her working tools. Much in the same way medical doctors carry their medical bag, this Voodoo practioner was simply trying to handle her business-warding off evil spirits. Besides, that not-so-secret bag that the SS men carry with the Prez contains Cheney's head...Just in case of a national emergency, like Bush having an independent thought. Let my Voodoo People Go!

Sunday, February 12, 2006

SEEN IN LINE TODAY

Dave Chappelle: Trying to figure out how he went off the 'psychological hook' and now making the rounds on television trying to convince us and himself that he was just 'chillin'. Dude, you saw Sly on the same show as you, right? So instead of denying you got help, GET the help! I don't like the thought of hearing you say, "I'm Sly Stone, Bitch!" Not a pretty thing...

Third Eye Blind?

We knew he had no heart, but now we know he has no vision. Vice-Prez Cheney accidently wounded his buddy while hunting quail. (I will refrain from making the cheap joke line here.) So, if his friend was wearing a bright orange vest and he was less than 30 yards from the Prez, what was the problem? Dick, (refraining from another cheaper, but applicable joke line), quails do not wear orange vests and carry guns! Lucky for his bud, the medical team/hospital needed to keep Cheny ticking, was able to respond to his wounds immediately. Someone should warn Bush about hunting with his Vice. On the other hand... Nah!

Answer Me This...

The Energizer Bunny PO-PO? So just who will be monitoring the disposal of batteries in our trash cans? This unnecessary environmental b.s. just keeps going and going and going...

Thursday, February 09, 2006

You're Scaring Me!

SLY STONE
So, o.k. a lot of folks did a lot of drugs, jail time and even head time-as in the 'nut house.' But, Sly...Anyone else think that when he came on stage at the Grammy Awards that someone was playing a joke on us? I kept thinking that the really tall Yoda with the platinum Mohawk and a real funky purple-lined robe-ala Prince- was an imposter or Sly with a mask, but not the Sly I knew. Well he shocked me and most all of America. But it was him! Makes one wonder what he was smoking and thinking all those years in seclusion. Maybe he should have been thinking about more rehab and psychiatric intervention and smoking way less? He's too scary for my unit... This is the stuff state hospitals try to handle.

NOTABLE QUOTABLES

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

Random Rants

It's Always Those Little Things That Gets To You, Like...
~Jessica Simpson: It's bad enough the game was a dud, but then we had to have another round of hazard boot walking. Jess, if you're gonna keep doing this little cat-walk make it hustle/flow! You're white gurl stiff! Put some J Lo in ya mix. Or keep it moving...
~Michelle Kwan: You’re too old for the gold. Go home and rock that cradle. Yeah, you got the free pass, but you failed to note it was by the back door.
~What is the world coming to when even Martin Luther King's kids can't even get along?
~Shouldn't the death of Corretta Scott-King have been the top story over Alito and Bobble Head Bush's Misstatement of the Union?
~Who needed another Bigger Momma Too, Martin or us?
~ Speaking of old skaters-Tonya Harding is living very large these days, although it's only the medication she was on...aight.
~Britney, you know that you were doing that 'teach baby to drive the pickup' thing with your baby. That's how all ya'll learn to drive in the trailer park!
~Is Madonna FINALLY done? She was so 'the same' for the opening of the Grammys. Go home to your babies too!
~Was anybody else offended by Bobble Head at the King funeral? But everybody still loves Bill!
~Let us be real honest about the latest postal delivery-stress, poor management and an employee on/or over the edge make for workplace violence. How many more lives will be stamped RETURN TO SENDER?